Sex Appeal: How to Be an Attractive and Appealing Woman
Sex appeal is an elusive quality that some women have and other women just do not have; isn’t it? It is often difficult to define sex appeal but it is easy to spot it in both men and women. A woman with sex appeal attracts men to herself all the time with what seems like little effort. So what is sex appeal and how can you get it for yourself?
Experts say that sex appeal is 20% physical appearance, 20% intelligence and 60% genuine confidence. Is this surprising to you? I think it may have been as we are often misled into thinking that physical appearance is what is critical (we imagine that it’s 80% or more of sex appeal) but as you can see sex appeal is not just about having a pretty face or great legs or a great body but about a whole lot more. Having a good physical appearance helps but it’s only 20% of sex appeal and so anyone with any shape or size can have quite a bit of sex appeal.
What is sex appeal?
1. It is confidence. Having great sex appeal means being confident in your femininity. Yes, there may be parts of you that you don’t like but you must find a way to draw away people’s attention from those parts and to highlight those things that you do like (refer to our 1st few newsletters).
2. It is a joy for living. A woman with great sex appeal will have an apparent effortlessness and joy in who she is and what she has accomplished in life. She will not necessarily be perfect but she will be at peace with who she is and what she has been given. Her eyes will twinkle with good humor and she will have an infectious smile. She will also have a great appetite for life and will be fully involved and engaged in life and in living. Her life will not be perfect but she will find joy in the small everyday victories. So if you want to have sex appeal you must start enjoying your life today…do not wait for a mythical tomorrow when everything will be as you wish it to be…for you to start enjoying your life.
3. It is being magnetic to others. A woman with sex appeal will have great confidence not because she is strong and never make mistakes but because she recognizes that she is an imperfect being doing her very best in every given situation. She may have bad moments or even days but over ally she has a realistic view of who she is and what she can and cannot do. She will find it easier to get what she desires in life because she is usually naturally magnetic and people like to be around her.
How to have sex appeal:
1. Have a realistic view of sex appeal. Understand and internalize the reality of what makes people truly attractive. Don’t believe the lie that looks and physical appearance are everything. Yes, presentation matters, but looks are only 20% of the total picture and there are really no agreed on standards of beauty across all cultures. The skinny runway model body type is really not the ideal for many men as a recent survey from the dating site Yangutu found. According to their findings, 78 percent of men prefer women with hour-glass figures, while another 17 percent of men are attracted to women who are of average weight. So there really is no agreed upon standard of physical appearance and what you may be trying to achieve for yourself may be unrealistic. You really just need to be healthy and fit regardless of the body type and shape that you have.
2. Dress stylishly. Regardless of your body shape and size, you need to dress your body to advantage. Regardless of whether you are tall and skinny or short and rather plumb or medium sized and boyish or have ears that poke out further than you would like or a nose that curves in a way that disturbs you. Good grooming and stylish dressing will work wonders for your appearance and your confidence. When shopping for clothes first understand your unique body shape and how to dress it to advantage so that you camouflaging your flaws while accentuating your best features. Try different things so that you get clothes that look good on you. Redefine fashion for yourself so that it becomes about wearing only those clothes that flatter you, regardless of what is ‘fashionable’ as you will feel comfortable, good, relaxed and confident in such clothes.
3. Style your hair. With all the advances in hair technology and products you have no excuse to have bad, unkempt or dated hair. Get the right hair cut for the shape of your head and for your pocket so that you can maintain your hair cut without too much strain. If you just don’t know what to do with your hair then save up for a stylist who can get you out of your bad or dated hair-rut.
4. Subtle make up. If you use make up then make sure that it actually highlights your best features. Do not overdo make-up as too much of it is unflattering. Understand the importance of dressing appropriately for each occasion. In the workplace there will be subtle but important rules about what you should wear. Having sex appeal at work should be personality driven as your clothing should only hint at it. Dress professionally according to your workplace standards and your individuality and sex appeal will still come through tastefully.
5. Learn to love your body. Don’t get all bent out of shape about your body shape or size. If you spend all your time and energy worrying about what isn’t right then you will tend to neglect your real assets; such as your great sense of the ridiculous, your infectious smile, your long shapely legs or your go-getter ability to get things done. Obsessing and worrying drain you of whatever sex appeal you may have had as they cause you to focus inward and draw in all the negativity that those around you may have. You thus lose your joy in life and your confidence in who you are and the gifts that you have been given. When you turn inward you tend to repel people as they try to avoid your negativity.
6. Be comfortable about your sexuality. Realize that you are a sexual being and you need to be comfortable with your own sexuality so that you are not confused, disgusted or ill-at-ease about your sexuality and the sexuality of others. This doesn’t mean that you have to be sexually active; it just means that you accept your sexuality as part of who you are. Sexuality is God given but if you are misusing it or feeling confused about it or dissatisfied with it then seek help and advice from the professionals. Body love and sexual identity are very closely entwined; if you feel bad about your sexuality then you will have a poor body image.